Counselling For Depression In Woking & Guildford

What Causes Depression?

There can be many causes to depression. Major threats or experiences can cause the onset of depression, and so can repetitive, minor experiences which drip feed negativity into the perception of an individual. The effect this can have is that the person’s perceptions of the world, and themselves, can become restricted by this negativity; as can the range of emotional experiences and reactions.

Depression can also arise from a conflict between an individual’s perception of themselves, and the person they feel they ‘ought to be’ – leading to difficulties in self-acceptance. Throughout life, we internalise ideals from others (parents, friends, society), and these internalisations can form a concept of who we believe we should be, which can sometimes be at a mismatch with who we are, or, can be such a tall order that we fail to meet expectations. In turn, we can then dismiss our self-worth with a negative internal dialogue which exacerbates the issue, further restricting or view of ourselves.

It can often be useful to think of ourselves in the form of ‘parts’, a set of self-concepts which form a whole person. For example, you may have said to yourself “a part of me thinks X, but then another part of me thinks Y & Z. Different ‘parts’ of ourselves are said to formed to adapt to different situations. For example, I may have a part of me which acts as a father, a part that thinks and acts how I believe a father should be. On the other hand, there may be a part of me which acts as a partner, friend or worker and I act in way which I perceive to be appropriate considering which role I am in. Thoughts, beliefs and actions can often differ between these parts even though each role is taken on by the same individual at different times. Sometimes there is conflict between ‘parts’ which can be difficult to manage, however, one of the main issues is often one ‘part’ taking over inappropriately Meaning one (or several) aspects of the individual is regularly minimised and discounted or not used in situations where those parts are needed to adapt to the current situation.

Depression can have a big impact in people’s lives. When in a depressive state, perception of the world can be restricted to negative views, as can an individual’s self-worth, self-esteem, self-confidence. This can greatly impact on a person’s hope for the future and indeed present moment – leading to a sense of hopelessness and feeling of pointlessness and lack of motivation or desire. Life can be stunted, opportunities not seized, friends can be rejected due to feeling of not deserving them and overall life can just feel dark; along with a gloomy and an incredible feeling of being stuck which seems impossible to shift.

Counselling can help work though all of these difficulties. Processing the conflicts within oneself and working through your self-concept and the self which one ‘ought to be’ can help untangle the experiences causing depression to arrive at a place where self-acceptance is achievable and can alleviate the symptoms associated with depression. As a result, the view of oneself, and life in general, is no longer restricted to negativity, emotions no longer restricted to low and overwhelming experiences, and balance can be restored between different ‘parts’ of an individual’s personality.